Enamorarse es de Sacrificarlo...
Three things I have learned this summer that are hard for me: 1) Most people like attention, 2) Most people like to boast, and 3) I will never be one of those people.
There are two things in life that frustrate me beyond what I feel my patience and morale can handle: 1) When people treat me like I am either a) stupid and/or b) like I don't know what I'm doing; and 2) When people thrive on thrusting their achievements and talents and opportunities onto everyone else. I'm sick of the same old conversations that begin with something like "I did this and I know this and 'this one time when I..' " and end something like "I can do this and I am good at this and so-and-so thinks I'm amazing"; and they always add the "not to brag or anything but..." which just frustrates me even more. You might think that exerting yourself so forcefully on others will make them like you more, or think more highly of you, but I just think you look desperate. I will never be someone to stoop to constantly trying to sell myself to feel good. Is this humility? Or pride? I just don't see the point in building oneself up. Why are we competing with one another? Community is about equality. If I wanted stratification I would be content with Capitalism. As I'm not, please don't use your "ladder climbing" techniques in conversations where I am present, I just might go choke myself.
...Y Yo Tengo el Nada Dejo Para Dar
Really this has nothing to do with love. But maybe it really does. I keep quiet because I don't like assumptions. I keep quiet because I don't believe in first impressions, stop sizing everyone up. I keep quiet because I hate pretentiousness. I know what I know, I know what I'm good at, and I know what I am capable of doing. I feel no need to convince anyone of this. I'm not living my life to please anyone. And if other people get recognition for something, or get praised for something because they were bluntly verbal about it, fine. One day I'm going to change the world....and no one is going to notice.
Que Yo Digo
Sometimes I want to be a jerk. Sometimes I want to be really mean. It's very hard work keeping your not-so-proper emotions subdued, but I can't act any other way. I would be no better than those I get frustrated with if I let my mouth run. I guess what I am saying is.....I want to find someone that I don't feel like I need to impress; someone who will make up for the endless shallow conversations where I just repeat over and over again in my head that I am bigger than this and its not worth my frustration; someone that will tell me that all along I was doing the right thing. I need that.
No...I don't need that. I retract my last paragraph. It was never written. It was never thought. I lit a fire now see me walk away...
